MARGARET LANGLEYGet the guide
In Charleston, a lady never…

Walk into any room like you were raised for it.

The quiet rules of old-money elegance, written down for the women who were never taught them: how a lady carries herself, what she says (and never says), how she behaves at the table, and how she makes everyone around her feel at ease.

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Instant PDF download · 42 illustrated pages · printable rule sheet and 30-day practice

Margaret Langley in her Charleston home with her Cavalier King Charles Spaniel
“Elegance is not money, my dear.”
The Grace Code

Elegance is not money.
It is five quiet habits.

Some of the most graceful women in Charleston lived on a schoolteacher's pension. Every habit in this guide can be learned, and most of them cost nothing at all.

G

Gentle presence

How you enter, sit, stand and dress. What people feel before you speak.

R

Restraint

What a lady never says, never shows and never posts.

A

Attention

Names remembered, compliments returned, the shy guest made welcome.

C

Composure

Calm words for rude remarks, interruptions, nosy questions and cold soup.

E

Example

The guest they invite back, the family member everyone trusts.

The Grace Code, by Margaret Langley
Inside the guide

The Grace Code

42 pages12 chapters30-day practiceThank-you note template
  1. 1The Quiet Entrance
  2. 2A Voice That Never Rises
  3. 3Dressing Quietly
  4. 4Compliments, Thanks and Words That Sound Expensive
  5. 5Questions She Never Asks
  6. 6Saying No, Saying Sorry, Handling Rude People
  7. 7Secrets, Gossip and What She Never Posts
  8. 8The Table: Napkin, Handbag and Phone
  9. 9Restaurants, Waiters and Never Making a Scene
  10. 10The Guest They Always Invite Back
  11. 11Family, Money and Kindness
  12. 12Grace That Ages Well

Every chapter ends with a short Practice This Week list and one Rule to Keep. In the back: The Grace Code at a Glance to print, the Thirty-Day Grace Practice and a handwritten thank-you note template.

A taste of the rules

Small things. Everyone notices them.

Chapter 4

Never answer a compliment with just "thank you."

A bare thank you quietly closes the door. The book gives you the words that hand the kindness back.

Chapter 8

Your handbag never touches the table, or the floor.

Where a small bag goes, where a large one goes, and what the napkin says when you leave the table.

Chapter 6

When someone is rude, you need one calm sentence.

The exact sentence, the pause, and the graceful exit, so rudeness never chooses your manners.

Margaret Langley in her garden in Charleston
About Margaret

Margaret Langley

Margaret is a Charleston widow who has spent seven decades watching, hosting, mourning and celebrating among some of the most gracious women in the South. Her mother kept a green leather book of rules on the hall table. Margaret has spent her life adding to it.

Every day she shares one rule from Charleston, usually with her Cavalier King Charles Spaniel in her lap. The Grace Code is the whole book, written down at last for the women who were never handed one.

“People forget what you wore. They never forget how you made them feel.”
— Margaret Langley, The Grace Code
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The words, ready in your handbag

Say It Like a Lady phrase cards
+ $9 at checkout

Say It Like a Lady

48 printable cards with the exact words for the moments that matter: compliments, saying no, rude remarks, gossip, the table, hosting, family and sympathy. Print, cut, and keep a few in your handbag.

When someone asks your age"Old enough to know better, and young enough to do it anyway."
When someone brings you gossip"Oh, I'm sure there's more to that story than we know."
When you are interrupted"As I was saying…"
The Langley Collection

The whole Charleston library, together

Get The Grace Code with its companion book and the phrase cards.

The Gracious Hostess

The Gracious Hostess

How to host a beautiful evening without exhausting yourself: invitations, the simple place setting, seating, afternoon tea, peaceful holidays, the houseguest and the wedding guest. With the Hostess Timeline. 21 pages.

Say It Like a Lady

Say It Like a Lady

48 printable phrase cards with the exact words for the moments that matter, plus a thank-you note page. 9 pages to print at home.

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Guide · PDF

The Grace Code

$27
  • 42-page illustrated PDF · 12 chapters
  • The Grace Code at a Glance (print it)
  • The Thirty-Day Grace Practice
  • Thank-you note template
  • Optional at checkout: the 48 phrase cards for $9
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Best value · all 3

The Langley Collection

$39 $53
  • The Grace Code (42 pages)
  • The Gracious Hostess (21 pages)
  • Say It Like a Lady: 48 phrase cards
  • All printable pages and checklists
  • Instant download · read on any device
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30

Read it. Keep it only if it helps.

If the guide isn't for you, email us within 30 days of purchase and you'll get a full refund. See the refund policy.

Questions

Before you buy

What exactly am I getting?

Digital guides in PDF. Buy The Grace Code on its own (and add the phrase cards at checkout if you like), or the Langley Collection with all three. Nothing is shipped.

How do I receive it?

Right after checkout your download buttons appear on screen, and an email with the same links arrives at the address you used. No account or password needed.

Is this only for wealthy women?

Not at all. The whole point of the book is that elegance is a set of habits, not a bank balance. Nearly every rule costs nothing.

I'm not from the South. Is it still for me?

Yes. The stories come from Charleston, but the rules work at any American dinner table, office, wedding or family gathering.

Can I read it on my phone?

Yes. The PDF opens on any phone, tablet or computer, and the rule sheet, practice plan and phrase cards are made to be printed at home.

What if it isn't for me?

Email us within 30 days for a full refund.

The Grace Code42-PAGE GUIDE · INSTANT PDFGet it — $27